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- Prabhat |
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Besides we indians hav made St.Claus into Santa Mama and in sm extreme cases Santa Singh,by convinced juveniles whu believe he has such a long beard and long hair cuz hes a Sikh! Well tht is *very* interesting,i can assure you if they ever manage to prove it,i'll eat my christmas stocking widout sauce (chilli wud be preferred).
Which reminds me,whu got ths bright idea of stuffing socks wid gifts? Socks shud only be stuffed wid powder to keep ur feet from itching (lol;) and wid deo/perfume to ensure they dont stink!
Incidentally,during the Elizabethan Age there was a shortage of water an so even the nobles had baths quite rarely - they managed to live only cuz of perfume. Ironic isnt it,a Queen,a noble,one of the most respected people of the country,stinking like poodle-waste,a more 'high society' term for dog-shit.
Which brings us to the term 'bull-shit'.Whuever made up this term had too much time on his hands cuz he has actually gone thru all the different excretas of biological organisms and analytically concluded that of all the animals in the Animal Kingom,the one which has the worst defecated matter is the bull.Interesting,now isnt it?
I also saw another interesting thing today - astrological predictions. Oh man,these horo scopes scare me black and blue,i mean they shud be called 'horror-scopes'.They are waaaay too accurate for my liking,i mean its almost as if sm1 walks around behind me wid a camera and then goes home and writes down the whole thing wid its consequences and puts it up for all (esp me) to see. The site i saw was http://www.webindia123.com/astrology
Check it out - its gud and also has this page of celebrities born in a zodiac,i went can checked libra (im libran - 15oct'89) and guess what i found? I found that the page for librans was 2wice that of the oders,that kumble,gandhi and lata mangeshkar were born in the same month as me.I also learnt that APJ Abdul Kalam is a 15 Oct born dude from 1931,and kareena kapoor has her bday exactly 6 days after mine. Talkin of 6,Dev Anand is also libran,and hey Amitabh Bachchan is also! Now I'm thinking its almost as if all people destined for greatness are born in the Libran Zodiac,and hey hey don't look now but I'm a Libran! Gives you ideas,dsnt it?
Another idea i got was to go jogging in the morning.one reason is that i like runnin and joggin and stuff like tht,two i have no other work.Besides a frnd of mine suggested another reason - Bird watching,if yu catch my drift. I flat out refused,wanna kno why? My eyes are tired,iv not slept in almost 3 days now,except for the odd one hour nap or so,iv been awake 2 days solid.
Its not just my eyes which are hurting,my hands are too! i dint know so many ppl cm online during the hols and guess again,i dint kno that ppl talk/chat so much,and i dint kno i cud type so much,i typed more than i did for my comp project,and whoa that was a 30 page project,so yeah i typed a lot.
Talking of projects,i hv one due on the day skool reopens,a history project of all things possible.Its bad enuf its a project and then u see the topic,its suicidal.
The topic is in 2 parts - first,religious differences in the policies of akbar and aurangzeb.Second,shah jahan the builder king. for 10 marx ill now be resrchng like a madman and then writing like a empty walnut,and at the end of it all i'll still be a mad nut (madman+walnut;)
Hopefully uv not gone nuts reading all tis,and if u hv,well "Join the club,friend":> |
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A dear friend,Dhruv,a shining star in the sky,
- Yours emotionally, |
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And so let the curtains rise - let the show begin!
2. Whilst boarding the plane, say in a loud voice "THAT WING SURE DOES LOOK RUSTY!!" (Best effect on kids or seniors fellow-passengers,sure to get a couple of weird looks)
3. When the plane is still on the ground, Rock back and forth in your seat and say aloud "THIS TURBULANCE SURE IS ROUGH!!" (Best to do this first and then the rest,in 8 hours maximum u'll be in the airlines list of "People who will never get boarding passes for the rest of their lives")
4. Wear rags and a headscarf, claim that your name is Svetolafoson Frojhkyhkjuhjdj and that you are being deported back to Estonia, look pleased when your told that this plane is not going there. say "Really?!, u haf not met me if zey ask zen, ok?!"
(This is good,but only if u can manage the accent,otherwise best advised to forget about it,practise in front of the mirror daily for at least 2 weeks for best results)
5. As the plane is landing, adopt the 'Duck and Cover' position as you scream "WE ARE GOING TO CRASH! ONLY DEATH AWAITS US ALL NOW! DEATH I TELLS YA!!!!" when you land safely, stand up and leave the plane normally, thank the stewardess for a lovely flight. (This is one of those things that can make people stay away from you,heck even stay at a 6-foot radius around you:>)
6. Go in to the toilet and make loud vomiting noises, keep going for a few minutes, then come out and announce to the plane that the toilet is blocked, act like its not your fault. (Pretty much the only gross thing on the whole list ;) )
7. Stand up and ask the passengers if anyone " wants to join the mile high club with you?" wink suggestively at various people...of both sexes. (WARNING, may cause certain social problems later on in life)
8. Get the pilot to show you round the cockpit, come out afterwards and say "YOU WOULDN'T HAVE THOUGH HE COULD FLY THE PLANE AFTER SO MUCH VODKA BUT IT JUST SHOWS, THEY REALLY ARE TRUE PROFESIONALS!". (WARNING,another dangerous stunt,if trying,please only try once plane has landed)
9. Streak. (WARNING: Highly dangerous activity,not recommended for senior passengers)
10. Occasionally scream........loudly. (This is guaranteed to work on any flight,any time,any country,in fact its the only thing on this list which can be done without any fear for being kicked out of the plane or being sued)
11. From the second you take off, every ten seconds say in the same voice "are we there yet?" (Try this on one of the flyers who look like corporate regulars,u know suits,just a handbag,bored look while flipping through in-flight magazines...)
12. Keep sniffing around and eventually say in a loud voice "CAN YOU SMELL BURNING?"(This is the most boring of them all and doesnt work that well anymore)
13. Go to the cockpit, wait a few seconds, then come back and say in a loud voice, "UMM SHOULD'NT THERE BE...LIKE....A PILOT?" (Say this once the stewardesses have gone,and at least a few people are looking why ur just standing there for no reason)
14. As you get off the plane, look worried and announce loudly" VAIT A MINUTE, VOT IZ ZIS PLACE?! ZIS IZ NOT POLAND, VERE ZE HELL IZ ZIS?!?!?!?" (This is another one of those gigs which doesnt work anymore due to overuse :( )
15. Get up and announce that you are going to hi-jack the plane, make to get out a gun, but act like its not there, check all your pockets and then say " OH CRAP, I MUST HAVE LEFT IT IN THE OTHER COAT, OK, NEVER MIND!" Sit down like nothing has happened. (Warning:This is the most dangerous,the most wacky,the only fool-proof stunt on this whole list.Try it at your own discretion.Not advised for people with weak voices or weak minds,both might crack after your co-passengers realize it was a gag!)
All of these are stunts/gags/practical jokes only presented for some laughs.I seriusoly take no responsibility for any blockheaded bozo who decided to try any of em and had to pay damages or suffer any sort of demoralization (legal action,social renegation,moral disintegration,etc)
I am writing this disclaimer because there are nuts in this world who think that they can do whatever shit they want and get away wid it just cuz they say it was someone else's idea (Damn,i know the blame-game works,I'v tried the same thing too)
Anyway,good nite all and have a pleasant flight ;)
Yours truly, |
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1. Better save that - we'll need it for the autopsy. |
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Its kinda interesting,but its waaaaay too much,its like learning how to steer and boat and being made to handle the Titanic! (whatever that means) But seriuosly our portion is humongous,its so big Goliath wud have problems trying to read all of it.Its so big if it was written in one textbook,it wud make an encyclopedia by itself! Etc,etc. But the point is its huge,and I have finished it! (well not as well as i wud like too,but hey whu cares??)
Yahoo! I almost hit the ceiling in happiness. I am not lying,i'm 5'10'' or so and if i jump and i can seriuosly crack my head on the ceiling. But thats not the point - the point is i managed to finish studying one of the deadly four subjects in which i was earlier destined to fail.
They are - maths,phy,bio and chem.Hell,chem is baaad,the chapters are each larger than the other,and the first chapter itself is about 15 pages!!That my friends can cause suicide attempts,which reminds me,u kno Julius Caeser? Apparently in that Cassius and Brutus both scorn suicide and then in the end take their own lives.Thats called being a hypocrite,and i know,cuz im writing this when i am supposed to be studying,and thats called hypocrisy,telling ur mom ur studying and dont want to be disturbed,then putting music!
Not that i care,as far as i know,i am pretty much getting ruined in 4 subjects,plz refer above ;),and so it dsnt matter what i do fr those four.Not that my conscience is happy wid this argument,this very moment,all the sense i have in my head is screaming at me to get up and study.
And so I will. |
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The day today wasnt all that bad,at least it wasnt all as bad like yesterday.Fact is
yest was a day rite out of the devils practise books.U kno,those little books were
the devil plans out days which are punishments for days when us ordinary mortals
have been too good.Well thats what happend,i had been good for th second term,whole
of it infact,kinda a record,and so this was punishment frm the devil for being
good.all i can say is now God is being kind and rewarding me for my good deeds ;)
It goes like tis - rem my comp project fiasco? well he said he remembered seeing my
project so he cud still giv me marks.And u rem my tests? Well,bio is being counted
(i got 10/10!) since she said she dsnt take tests which dont matter,and thats a gud
thing fr me,if nt fr evry1 elz.
As for the other 3 tests - maths,phy and chem,all the 3 teachers said tht those wr
jst revision tests,and so they wont count them! Yahoo! Party! My internals arent
ruined after all - see God is kind :>
Anyway,i also went frwrd in football today,i play as goalie or defense,and today i
decided i ws gtng bored so i went forward,but I only took one shot and that dint go
:( But its ok,tomm is still there,no wait it isnt,we have study leave! :) See,i told
u God was kind.
And after all this,i am not scrwd in Bio,did i mention i dint kno most f it? Well
now i hv mentioned it,and since we have study leave i wont be failing,not that i
ever doin exams,and its a relief to know i wont. Damn the smiley has too small a
smile to put here - :):> then what? Anyway,u get the point,rite?
It is a gud day,and yes all ladies and gentlemen,God is kind.
Yours (almost) happily, |
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Yest ws amng th wrst days i hv evr been thru - such days shud be illegal!!
First,i had 4 tests-maths and all science,meaning maths,phy,chem and bio.
Thats bad enuf,hvng 4 tests,then not having any idea wts hpng in them is worse.In
the end i knew only a mrk in Bio,but the guys around me also knew a mark each,so i
got 10/10 in that.Thats the only one in which i got any marx.The other 3 i got zero
in all,meaning aggregate:ZERO,average:ZERO.highest,yes try guessing:ZERO
That totally deserves a word i usually dont use: the day was fckall.I mean i got
a total of 10 on 40,barely missed getting a bad remark after the teacher heard me
abusing once i got my physics marks.and after all this i had computers to bear.U kno
what ws so bad abt the comp period? Well,i had a project due for 80 marks on
"DataBase Management Systems and their application in daily life",minimum of 25
pages of writing and pictures plus flowcharts.I actually did the whole damn
thing,and then that idiot my teacher lost it!!! He said hes lost it,but he said it
was more probable that sm1 flicked it.It's happend before too,that my projects get
flicked cuz its well-known i have the best marks in comp,english and geog in the
9th,so my assignments and projects often get flicked.I started xeroxing my projects
before givin them up so i hv a backup.But i dint hv a copy of this comp proj cuz i
finished it at the last minute,so im scrwd.Screwed cuz he dsnt kno what to do,and
nor do i,so i am pretty much ruined - i have lost 80 out of 200 marks!
Why,you may ask,80 out of 200? Cuz we hv 100 marx internals and 100 marks paper,and damn the
paper,thats ok,its internals which are now ruined of mine.Anyway,besided that i also
got hurt on my knee,but compared to the rest of the day,that was as good as being
blessed.
Yours whiningly, |
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I wrote this sometime last year,in class for a 15 mark assessment.I don't rememer
how much I got but I had later typed it out and I found the file today while looking
for a friends phone number.So without further ado,I bring to you ...
What's in a name?If someone asked me that, I could give them a
three hour (and seven minute) lecture on the above title, for I believe that a
title is as good as a summary of what you write. Therefore, with all due
respect to Jane Austen for her copyright (perhaps!), I now wish to begin my
story from my pride of being an angel, prejudice against me and my ultimate
phoenix-like rise from the ashes.
To expand on the above highly compressed and encapsulated summary
of this particular incident, a flashback of about ten months or so is
necessary, to the month of March last year, on the occasion of my paternal
aunt's wedding. Just as every other wedding, there was great excitement in the
house, nervousness to get everything right, and of course, a very happy aura
generally everywhere.
My day, however, did not begin on such a happy note. You see, I am
not a very superstitious person. However, my general experience shows that when
I get up at 6 o'clock in the morning out of daily school habit, in the process
hitting my fragile head upon the bedstead, and then wearing my slippers on the
wrong feet, my day just has to go on tad bit abnormal side for me.
So I was very cautious after this same routine happened on the day
of my aunt's wedding. Even after I was ready after breakfast, I was a bit
uneasy, but I shook it off, and went on to collect my responsibilities for the
day. As it turned out, I only had two things to do – take care of my younger
cousin, and make sure that my father's video camera was in safe and secure
hands, namely mine.
Everything was fine until late evening, the rites were about to
begin, and so the presence of the video camera was compulsory. That, however,
could not happen, as the video camera was not working properly. 'Not working
properly' as in 'Not working at all' and I was sure that was not a good thing
for me, as I had been in charge for it's well-being.
There are court-jesters in every family, I was not one of them. I
was the family's court-technical-gadget-handler-fiddler-all-in-one, and I have
a very good (or perhaps bad, as seen from viewpoint) reputation at that.
I always pride myself on not getting into trouble (not any major
problems, at least) but my reputation for fiddling with everything in sight got
me into trouble. So despite all of my protests, pleads, and insistations, I was
banished for half the rites, as temporary punishment for spoiling the camera,
mood, and preparations, though I did not, yet I had to bear the punishment.
Taking the investigative approach was perhaps a good idea, I
thought, and so risking death due to exhaustion because of running from my
parents through half of Asia, I decided to go around asking anyone if they saw
anyone else even touching the camera. It at last worked, and also proved my
forebodings of that being my unlucky day right. But I took contentment in the
hope of seeing my cousin run over half of Asia, for I asked him and got to an
extent a reasonable answer," What happened to the camera I had fixed it after
I saw that whatever I saw was being recorded, so I changed it so it din't
record what I saw, and so only I can remember what I saw".
The day was saved by my genius of a five-year-old cousin, mischievous
brother, and certified devil all in one. Long story short, he tinkered with the
camera, then in occurrence of time, found his mistake, apologized to everyone
(including me) and thus, cleared my name. I was allowed in to the rites, I
enjoyed it like everyone else, and the bonus was everyone was extra nice to me
for the next few days (a happy ending).
Thus ended a story of pride, prejudice and ultimately, a happy
ending.
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Well,its finally happend,the world has gone nuts.A frnd of mine,maybe a couple of
friends,gave me a couple of ids to add.See what happnd was i just made a new id on
msn,and i had to add all my contacts all over again.
And in the middle of this i forgot to save my whole contact list,smhow a couple of
groups got bunked,
so the next day u cud hv seen me askin all the ppl i kno to send me their email ids
and any1 they think i may have added again.I started out wid only 80 ppl,now im on
140,lol!
Well anyway sm ppl added me and i was totally freaked - ppl i had no idea of wr
sending me msgs as if i had known them for 10 years! anyway,most of them i hav
managed to figure out,and smhow they know me,i think its cuz of my frnds whu find
nthng other than skool to talk abt,even if their online!
That is kinda pathetic,and i have said many things ar pathetic earlier too,but this
really is.
Thats pretty much all for now,i hav to go and do maths now (ack!yuck!gag! - im
dyin'!)
On the good green side of th fence,i finally finished physics,which was a nightmare
for me,
and now i'm leaving to prevent my head being cut off by my parents. [seriosly,yes]
Bye then, |
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Has anyone heard of Papa roach? They relased a song 'Of angels and insects'.Pretty
gud,an awesome mix of reggae rap with softcore rock.They aren't all metal like
Rammstein and they arent a core-band of pure rock,like Metallica.They don't have the
artistry,that subtle anger of Linkin Park either.Quite simply put,these guys deserve
a new genre of their own.Th song is frm their album named quite weirdly -
"LoveHateTragedy" and yes its all one word.
Quite true,those two phrases in apostrophes - life is pretty much a love-hate
tragedy isn't it? And we all know we are frnds wid ppl so nice they may as well be
God's angels and on the other hand ppl so crappy, to call them insects wud be an
insult to the flies and mosquitoes outside my window.Which reminds me,does anyone
know why mosquitoes don't bite in winter? Or is it just me thinking that they feel
cold too?
Anyone who read that and has any ideas plz do mail me,and hey i thought of changing
the format a bit,and im adding the chat function at the side.Tell me what ya think
when i update it.
Lets see how it works out,cuz ill be writing the template frm scratch,and its a
challenge even though I do know HTML and Javascript and all that stuff
["Thankyou,thankyou." - bowing and sitting down again].
Why cant they just make templates which have different styles??Why do they force the
ppl making blogs to work so hard just for a new look,though the idea of a blog is
effortlessness (supposedly!).
Anyway,enuf of the self-pity,a new day has begun and a new chapter in the life of my
physics textbook. |
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This blog business is not good for health.Especially for the health of your
fingers.Come to think of it,I can't feel my fingers,thy're numb frm all the typing I
did today.Why was i typin like a madman? I wrote a compo,and now i'm just finishing
it off,u know,polishing it.Ill post it later.
As for my last post,someone asked me who the face i mentioned was.Now here comes my
theory about the people of this world.I think they fall into the following
categories:
As it happens,psychos wud get the reply "Wats it to u?" but this happend to be a
very decent person.So instead of trying to explain,I lapsed into jingle poetry,u
know tht kind where the lines rhyme but its not neccessary the lines make sense.
Anyway,the poem (or is it jingle |